Christmas treats

Christmas is a wonderful time of the year in many different aspects. Like I mentioned on my other post, you have festive music, birth of our Savior Jesus Christ, fun Christmas lights and yummy treats...as long as you can eat them. I remember last year was very hard especially since we weren't sure what was going on with my health and diet. It was difficult to watch others eat and feel left out OR I would just give into the temptations and get sick later.

December is a hard month with all those yummy goodies and trying not to feel sorry for myself. On the positive note, it helps me eat healthier and not too much. I have a wonderful husband and mother who go up and out of their way to make sure I still have similar treats like the others. Gluten-free treats don't usually taste the same (or course, they don't), but that doesn't mean we can't try. To me, it is just the thought and love they show by finding me another goodie.

I will admit that this Christmas season is a bit more easier to keep my diet in control and find things that I CAN eat. When you take the time to research and do your homework, sometimes it makes the whole world of difference! I'm not saying I don't miss all the yummy treats I used to be able to eat and not get sick from....because I do. Occasionally, I will take a small bite of Chloe's or Trent's just for fun and enjoyment...the hard part is not eating more! But that's where I'm grateful that I'm only gluten-intolerant (for now) and can take those seldom bites. If I were true celiac, that would NOT be an option!

Anyways, I'm grateful for all those who have helped me and Trent on this new adventure as it hasn't been easy! Some days are really hard and very emotional. Although, I know I'm not alone either - I have many family and friends to help me on this journey. I also have my Savior Jesus Christ who knows what I'm going through and will always be there for me! We're not fully convinced that we know any solid answers. But we do know that this gluten-free diet is working fairly good at the moment. After pregnancy and life adjusts with another child at our house, we will look into our different options.

Pregnancy & bloating

Wow, it's been a long time since I updated my diet blog but I'll try to keep it short!

The other day it dawned on me that it was almost six years ago this fall that all my health problems started. I've tried not to complain and still focus on the positive outlook on this huge struggle, but it hasn't been easy. Both Trent and I have learned lots about ourselves and also about Heavenly Father's plan for me. So hopefully I can even learn something about myself as I write this post. 

Right before I got pregnant, we weren't sure if this gluten-free diet was even working and my symptoms were coming back....and then I found I was pregnant! So it made things even more interesting! The first four months of my pregnancy was LOTS of morning sickness and tiredness! But we pushed on each day looking toward the time when I would feel much better! Chloe was such a trooper and loved watching movies or Curious George! 

Less than about a month, all the morning sickness seemed to disappear! I started feeling better and had more energy throughout the day. On the flip side, my stomach began to bloat a little more each day until I started to really notice a difference. Luckily, we snapped a few pregnancy photos that looked fairly normal when I was 16 weeks! I wouldn't worry too much about the bloating and being uncomfortable except that my stomach bloated whether I eat something little, a normal meal or even just a small snack. Some days, I would look like I could be 30-35 weeks pregnant though I'm not even half way done! Talk about a big difference especially when it comes to clothing. I don't really remember when I started wearing maternity clothes with Chloe I think it's a little bit too early for this pregnancy clothes especially on this gluten-free diet and also that I can't gain much weight either. Both of us are beyond frustrated and not sure what to do anymore! The topic is very tender to me right now and easy to break down into tears, but I still try and talk about it often. 

So therefore, we've done a bit of scoping around, got a few specialized thoughts, and feel it best that I go back to the grindstone with doctors again. :( This time, I'm going to start with a family doctor in hopes that maybe it will be more successful. (I went to a specialist about a year ago that was somewhat helpful, but now that's not a choice with Trent's new insurance). Hopefully, nothing is too out of whack or wrong and can be fixed during my pregnancy, too! We are praying that I can find some answers very soon both for our sakes and our baby!!

Diet update

Forewarning: This isn't the most positive, uplifting blog. So if you don't want to read, I understand, it just helps to get my thoughts out. 

I've lived my whole life (until recently) enjoying day to day foods, giving no thought to allergies or special diets. These past months have NOT been easy, some days very frustrating. It's a hard balance between watching others enjoy french bread, granola bars and even wheat thins OR realizing that I WILL feel sick if I eat them. Recently, I admit to eating a homemade cookie or dipping a few chips in onion dip, but I wish the side effects didn't happen. My wonderful husband has been a tremendous help since the beginning of all this. Six & a half months on a gluten-free diet is a long time and yet I'm only 27 years old! I wish I could say that being on a gluten-free diet is helping and I'm feeling back to my normal self, but.......

...it isn't. :(

My gut instincts tell me that maybe it is a lactose intolerant as well. When I started avoiding gluten, I told Trent that I couldn't do both - too stressful emotionally and physically planning meals/food. A lot of my previous symptoms (nausea, tiredness, bloating, restlessness, occasional headaches, fatigue, and such) are starting to reappear especially after mealtime AND when I go without eating for a few hours. It's almost like I need to keep some food in my system as much I feel like I'm eating all day. 

But I'm very grateful to those who have helped me get where I am today! Trent and I couldn't have done it alone. Chloe is such a good sport to eat different food or snacks right next to me, even though I know she wants to share. Aunt Ann has given me lots of recipes to cook....banana muffins are my favorite!! My parents have also helped out by buying me special treats or ingredients so that I feel included in family activities! Most of all, Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ won't ever leave me no matter how hard or emotional my health diet roller coaster takes me. 

Banana muffins

Last night, Trent and I made some yummy banana muffins with rice flour for me! When I went to pull them out of oven, my hopes of a delicious gluten-free treat diminished! They looked brown and burnt! My wonderful husband rushed in the kitchen and reminded me that my food is going to look different now. He even tasted a little bite and reassured me that they tasted very good! I wasn't convinced until I bit into one this afternoon!

YUMMY!!!

I'll admit that this gluten-free diet is not an easy thing for me. I love crackers, muffins, granola bars, bagels, and lots more gluten-filled foods! But I've learned what Aunt Ann once told me when she said that one day I won't want to eat those certain foods. In all honesty, I didn't fully understand what she meant nor did I want to restrict my diet. You simply can't stop eating foods that you've eaten your entire life....at least that's what I thought. Anything is possible.....no matter how hard it sometimes seems!

Many days, I feel like I'm eating the same things over and over again. My poor husband told his former co-worker that we tend to have lots more Mexican food lately. True. Mexican food is much easier to cook when dealing with gluten-free dishes! But Trent is an easy-going guy and Chloe loves cheese! So, it hasn't been too bad lately!

Anyways, back to the banana muffins! I'm so happy that I have a healthy treat in the freezer that I can quickly warm up! Some days are hard when I can't eat the same things as Trent and Chloe without feeling sick afterwards! Thanks to Aunt Ann for the rice flour and yummy recipes! Hopefully, I can have more gluten-free treats (and healthy ones) around so I come out on top of this diet!

new website

Oh, how I love my little Chloe bug so much, but sometimes I just need a little mommy time to rejuvenate my mind especially with Trent gone longer now. The other afternoon I ran across this new website and really can't remember how I found it, but I'm beginning to love it more each day!

From my previous posts, you probably know that gluten-free foods are NOT cheap! So we talked about what route we should take in buying specialty foods for me. We narrowed it down to three options:

1-Buy all pre-packaged foods and/or meals: Frozen dishes, box dinners, ready made cookies and such.The cost of food would be much higher.
2-Treat myself to occasional pre-packaged foods but only once in awhile. Cook with rice flour and try to make homemade recipes that I can freeze and then just pull out.
3-Mix together a gluten-free flour base and cook all my food - with no added helpers. Gluten free flours are more complex in its ingredients compared to the basic white or wheat flour.

After much contemplation, we decided to do #2 which would still give me some flexibility as I travel on this new adventure. Since now we're more careful in our cooking lifestyle, I've wanted to find a website that I can get recipes off which don't require a complex gluten free flour. (I have basic rice flour currently, not all the potato starch, tapioca flour and such).

The other day, an angel must have directed my fingers where to go cuz I found this new website: Gluten Free on a Shoestring! Lots of simple recipes, easy explanations, a young author feeding a family on a budget, basic kitchen ingredients!! I've had to limit myself browsing on this site due to limited 'mommy time', but it looks like something that might work! YEA!!

Early birthday present

This past weekend, we spent some time with Trent's family doing Easter activities and birthday celebrations. I knew it would come sooner than later when we would attend a family gathering with food. (Not a lot people know I eat gluten-free now, so it's still kinda awkward). I would have to be strong about not eating all the gluten-filled foods. It wasn't easy and I answered a lot of questions from lots of my in-laws. Some of them were totally shocked that I basically can't eat much of anything anymore! Yep, welcome to my new adventure! 

My birthday is in April and supposedly one of the birthdays we were going to celebrate. But how fun it would be to watch everyone else eat cake and ice cream and me having none. :( Not cool. But everything turned out to be just fine and dandy. My brother-in-law even cooked me some chicken breasts and potatoes while everyone else ate a pasta casserole and french bread! 

I've only had a little experience with others eating yummy foods with me just watching and smiling along. I knew it was all in my attitude and that I could conquer this trial step by step. Everyone sang 'happy birthday' and I even received a couple of presents, too! Some days cake and ice cream don't even sound appealing to me cuz they're just loaded with sugar. So when my brother-in-law came back in the kitchen with three little cold packages.....I totally recognized one of the packaging!! Three gluten-free treats all for me!! I opened two of the three for a birthday dessert and then was told I got to take the rest home! 

What a wonderful birthday surprise! I feel so special and loved from these particular angels because I know that gluten-free treats aren't cheap! Thanks for totally making my day!!

And yep, I've tasted all three and loved them all! We shall see how long they last...probably not long though!

Bumpy ride

When I was a kid, I always wondered what life would be like if I had an allergy to a certain food....silly me, I know. Oh, I probably jinxed myself.  Yet, it's interesting how Heavenly Father leads us on a path that we NEED as much as we WANT. Back in Rexburg, Trent and I spent lots of time and ate many meals with my extended Blackham family (especially Uncle Kevin, Aunt Ann and their family). I watched Aunt Ann prepare meal after meal and it never phased me how she fed her family each day on a celiac diet. A visitor to their home would never know she eats differently.

I look up to her a lot more now that I am a wife and a mother in her similar situation but with a young family. It isn't easy to watch Trent or Chloe eat chocolate chip cookies or homemade muffins! Don't get me wrong...I can cook myself the same foods, but it doesn't taste the same. My wonderful husband tries his best and wants me to have all food possibilities...but sometimes that just isn't possible. He made me some chocolate krinkle balls this past weekend and they are really yummy!!

As a young couple, we don't really go out to eat much. Sometimes we would splurge once on about $10 and get dinner depending on the month! There are only a few restaurants that are gluten-free and even then, you still have to be careful with cross-contamination. Unfortunately, parties and family gatherings fall into this same category, hard as it may be. We have gone to a few recently and it hasn't been easy for either of us. The best way to conquer this obstacle and not make a scene is to bring my own food. At first, that sounds fine and guarantees that I have food to eat. But when it comes down to eating and watching others have food that I USED TO eat, there's where I fall weak.

My real hope is that I can come out on top of this diet and be able to eat differently around others. I still don't feel good some days but I know I must focus on the positive things. I've lost a lot of weight and even able to now wear some of my old high school pants!

Yummy surprise!!

My Aunt Ann is amazing! (So is my mom and her other sister)! But today, Aunt Ann totally made my day when Trent found this yummy package sitting on our porch! The past few weeks have been a struggle for me  as I start on this gluten-free diet. It isn't to cook for two groups of people and not be able to enjoy the same foods! Some evenings, I'm ready to give up and only eat a few pieces of cheese or fruit. Aunt Ann has been very willing to share tips and advice to us for the past few months! She found out she had celiac over 25 years ago and can't even eat the tiniest bit of gluten or she gets really sick. 

When I started on this diet, we decided to only have me eat gluten-free due to expenses and high price of some foods! It's been rough to buy a few expensive pastas, crackers or cookies that I can cook or snack on with Chloe. My wonderful parents have also helped us out in the beginning and recently bought me a few really pricey items! Aunt Ann also has really helped me out, both physically and emotionally! I think, she was pretty close to the same age as I am when she was diagnosed with celiac disease, 

One thing that really stuck out to me is how Aunt Ann said that once I start eating gluten-free, I won't ever want to go back! It was hard to believe that, especially since I was giving up lots of yummy breads, meals, and treats. No way! We're more careful in food preparations because now I will get some of the same previous symptoms back whenever I eat something that contains gluten. She was totally right! Overtime, I've learned I can quite enjoy gluten-free cookies, crackers, and snacks! 

She totally brightened my day when I opened this package and saw the inside!! Yummy, yummy, yummy!  

I'm so excited to start cooking more with rice flour and gluten-free foods! I know I won't master all the recipes the first few times! Celiac cooking is much different! With lots patience and practice  I can do it better each time!!

This week has been a little rough with no money coming in and Trent not working right now. It makes us more grateful for Heavenly Father's blessings to us and the times when he does have employment! Eventually, he will find a job and I will be in better control of this gluten-free diet. For now, we are striving for more faith and patience as we realize that our lives are in Heavenly Father's Hands.

Roller coaster ride

Every time I attempt a dinner menu something goes wrong and it doesn't work! I write down possible meals and then get excited to cook them. But then comes the night and I don't feel like cooking or we don't have my gluten-free ingredients! Maybe it's because most of the food that I cook, I can't eat....discouraging!!! But on the flip side, I try my hardest to find meals that we can eat as a whole family! Good thing I have a wonderful husband and daughter who love me whether I have a full stomach or a face of tears!

I'm pretty sure that Chloe has picked up something about me and my eating habits. Breakfasts are usually good with me and Chloe eating the same things...Rice Chex, oatmeal, waffles, or eggs. Although, lunch is a different story! My recent discovery is that she doesn't like chunky peanut butter and does better when I give her fruits or cheese/meats last! She eats a lot better when Trent is around or at dinnertime! If I try my best to eat with her (including snack time), she does a lot better and we're both happily full!

My hope is that soon I can make and cook dinner menus that we all enjoy without getting too frustrated  We're both grateful to have found some answers, but the struggles aren't over as we strive to buy inexpensive foods and cook meals we all can eat together! 

Gluten-free for me!

As much as I love making decisions, the past couple of months I've learned so much about myself and what I can do if I put my mind to it! Yet, it's great to be feeling better and more active each day! I don't exactly remember when the promptings started, but it was a clear indication to me that I needed to go on a celiac diet.

Stubborn, as I sometimes can be, I didn't want to try or attempt this new lifestyle. For as long as I can remember, my Aunt Ann has eaten differently than the rest of us, but I didn't realize the struggle avoiding foods is until I started with milk products. Of course, milk-free diet is so much easier than a gluten-free one. Then I met with a gastro specialist after Thanksgiving and he wanted to me to do a more serious diet either gluten or milk. Both Trent and I knew that my stomach did fairly fine with milk products so we decided for the celiac diet. After countless tears and avoiding meals, my wonderful mother took us shopping and helped me realize that grocery shopping IS POSSIBLE - just takes a little bit extra time!

I'll be honest and admit that Christmas time is not the best time to do a gluten-free diet, but my two weeks came and went, faster than I thought. We went to Trent's parents for Christmas which wasn't easy either, but  his mom was great and tried to cook a few things for me. Through all this, I knew deep in my heart that I needed to go on a gluten-free diet, just didn't want to admit it out loud AND in front of others!

So after eating whatever on New Year's Day, I tried to have a better attitude about gluten-free foods and started my diet on January 2nd. Gluten is in so many things that you have read the ingredients almost every food. Wheat, barley and rye, all have different names that you have to know a huge list of sub-ingredients. Ever so slowly, both Trent and I are learning what foods are better for me and which ones to avoid. Some meals are still hard as I cook something different for Trent and Chloe. Mostly, I try to cook dinners so that we can eat the same thing. Other times I have leftovers from the night before.

There is also a great friend here in my ward that let me borrow some of her cookbooks last week! I didn't really cook anything from the recipes, but it helped me realize that I am still normal eating gluten-free and cooking for my family. This new lifestyle requires extra time and energy but that shouldn't stop me. Some days I still fall into tears especially when I smell yummy food that I can't eat. But I'm grateful that I have found some answers through wonderful people who have cheered me on and will always be there for me!